The Last Saturday of April

Was not productive at all. So was Good Friday ( 22nd April 2011)

I just felt like sleeping the entire day and that was what I did. I slept. Woke up, did some chores, slept back. Woke up, watch a movie, and slept back. Woke up again, ate again, slept back and that was pretty much how my weekend went. Which was really relaxing, to be honest and I know finals are less than two weeks and I am taking this too lightly because I keep thinking that 2 subjects, nah no problem I can nail it, but look what happened when I was over-confident the last semester?

Anyways pupu's not back yet, since morning, I kind of miss him, but I guess I've to get used to it. He even asked what happened to my blog, haha I hope he doesn't find out about this :P

Sis and dad just got back from their flight from Kelantan and okay, I need to complete this assignment up and send it before I fall back to sleep again.

Happy Easter folks :-)

Bye week 5, hello week six!

Aha! Yes I accomplish jumping into this pool. I watched this one movie, whereby there's this one girl who firstly visualizes something she wants to accomplish so badly and then, she keeps seeing it until she makes the vision become reality.

So how has week five been?

Monday was, eating Arabian food.

Tuesday was, briefing for the futsal IPT League

Wednesday was,

Thursday was fitness test.

Friday was studying.

Saturday was Indian Rice with my family and watching baby brother's talent time.

Sunday was with my family, having a wonderful lunch at this Swedish place I grew up with.

In between the books and learning how to run with a freaking futsal ball( legend taught me well), I've to adapt with quizzes and assignments. I mean, yeah why am I making a big fuss out of it? Every student has to go through it, but I am thankful I've done my draft for my assignment part and I feel so bad, that I am unable to present for my human resource presentation. ( Speaking of which, I need to print that exemption letter for my presentation and classes)

So we've intense training this week, 7pm-12am. I think I can't make it on Tuesday, I've a quiz and I've to do it well. And the tournaments next week, YIKES. Thank God for Fawie to help me out with the passings and running with the ball.

It's 4am and I really should hit the bed, even a friend just instant messaged me asking why am I still up. Is it odd for a girl to be up this late?

I don't think I will be going back until my break, God I'm so exhausted from travelling and it's taking up so much of my energy.

P.s: We're planning a roadtrip to Universal Studio's. God I will do the planning, but it is only You that can make it happen. If it's Your will God, let it be done. Amen. :)

I don't know.

Too attached.

:D

Didn't get to swim, only put my feet in. happy enough.

:p

Arabian Food!

Today we headed to the Arabian shop and I had this. Hummus with Arabian bread. Their food's really healthy! Oh so today was our first briefing for the upcoming league for futsal and we're heading north in two weeks time :-(

I am scared, because I do not know anyone and this is my first time representing my university. God please please help me, there must be reasons why You allowed me to represent my university.

And excited. because it's something new.

Midterm was alright, I am so glad I put in some effort to study and review my work for these two subjects, I feel like I know my work well :-) Yay!

WOOHOO

Today's one heck of a hectic and pack day.

So here's the plan sarah.

Ace midterm.

Study up human resource for tomorrow's quiz.

Go for futsal game.

And try to get good food.

thank You God, for giving me the chance to be part of the team. :) Thank You so much God. I hope the team's nice people, since I'm the only chinese-thai student there. It's always well, awkward at first, but I hope things gets better

fingers crossed :-)

day: 30

Exactly a month before the finals. I'm hyped up to study real hard. It's two subjects. C'mon Sarah A! Don't screw this up!

How's things so far? tried studying auditing, seems pretty straight forward and simple, but I haven't attempt the past year questions. Lots of work to do tonight. Wish me luck!

Sweet Mother of rambutan

Annoying kid who won't be my model when I was doing my photography.

Hi. I am back in campus & I miss campus life. Yes, I have been away from one week now and I think I miss my campus life a lot. To be honest, I love studying on my table. And I try to get less distracted by the laptop ( still working hard at it) and it seems to be pretty good.

done with five lecturers for my upcoming midterm and I don't bloody plan to fail it. My father has worked hard to send me in university and i don't bloody plan to flunk anything. If i don't get a first class this semester, please slap me. Please let me jump down. I am not being over-confident or what not, I just need to motivate myself more and more.

I just asked A.M about internship and what do they really look out for. Here's what she told me ;

KPMG- Alot of interns ( 2nd class upper and above)

PWC - based on results

EY- involvement more than results but not too strict on results ( She said she wasn't 2nd upper when she applied)

So where too? She said in the end , we have to pray and ask God where He wants us to be. Pray and if it's a place for me there, God will make a way for me.

I paused to be honest right that. I forgot about God. I kept thinking about me me me me I I I I. Thank you for the reminder A.M. You've helped me since I entered university up to now. You've been a great person. :-)

Enough of my books, I think I want to watch Glee. Or Gary Unmarried and head to bed early. New week tomorrow, need a great head start.

P.s: Darn, I need to do laundry :|

"Think not about the reasons why it might not work out but figure out one good reason why it will"

I know one good reason. :-)

" You are always not happy with yourself. Why aren't you? Be happy. I am happy. And stop thinking too much , you over think!"

"And, you know what, it comes back to you in the end"

Yesh, rattling and rumbling about the same thing again and again, but I April's a new good month and I always brush it aside. Where are you? Are you safe? Why didn't you turn on your phone? Maybe you are just too tired. :-) I understand, three days hiking and all.

I miss you , hurry hurry come back, get enough rest. I want to talk to you, I miss talking to you. :-)

Okay it's always so much better when I don't overthink. Yeah. Okay. anyways I just heard my brother say " I think I spend 80% of my time copying the questions dad"

Cute brother. My mom and dad just celebrated their 23rd anniversary. I wish my anniversary would last this long next time, they're high school sweethearts since 18. :-)

Toodles. I want to go enjoy some time with the family. :-)

Hello, just reminiscing sweet memories

I was trying to recall these really two important, no make that three occasions to me.

First was new years eve countdown. It was the first time, to be honest celebrating it with the world. I never really liked celebrating it with the world, I usually do it with my family at home. Headed to Jonker Street, it was so pack. Like we could stand in the crowd for 10 minutes without even walking. haha, so pupu & I resorted to standing in front of one of the cafe's until the crowd settled down. It was pretty fun, met up with all my old friends in Melaka that I met in 2008 and Faqrie got dragged by this old drunk lady to dance with him, it was hilarious.

Then there was my 21st birthday party. With my friends, with my family, with you. One whole week of celebration, even someone said " Wah your birthday's like a sambutan negara" It was the best 21st ever :-)

And the scuba diving. The seasick ferry ride, the black snake, the beautiful stars, the walking out for supper because there's always no food left thanks to all the guys. They left only vegetable for me :-(

Oh and the kampung swing and cycling in the kampung with really huge slippers and getting so scared going underwater.

I don't know, I like to remember all these good things in my life. It's just so beautiful :-)

Things I remember;

I remember strolling by the beach with you, and then I look down and saw a snake, a black snake. I ran away, so fast that you didn't know the snake was there. I jumped on you after that because I was too scared :|

I remember pushing you in the pool on a hot Saturday and then we crashed some random apartment's pool & then headed to the clubhouse to have a pretty decent meal, all wet.

I remember telling my golden retriever " Do not speak, unless you are spoken too" and then he kept quiet immediately.

I remember walking through the parade of clowns and people walking on stilts and you watching me do my hand painting of a bee, just because I wanted too. And then it rained heavily.

I remember playing Risk with my brother in the dark ( because of the Earth Hour) & then when it was time to turn on the lights, my brother realised he was conquering the wrong territory all along. Wasted his whole one hour defeating me :p

I remember getting my first sea sick ever in the ferry on the way to Tioman, while this cyclist dude sat next to you watching you comfort me, because I puked. ( HAHA yes I puked, who cares :p )

I remember running under the heavy rain with my friends after the hot air balloon, couldn't see a darn thing while crossing the road. We just ran like chickens without heads.

I remember scuba diving in the sea, and then the instructor told me to take off my regulator, I felt like killing him. ( the regulator was where I get the air from the tank) & I remember my instructor telling me to fill my mask with sea water while I was 6 feet under the sea, and I felt like kicking him.

I remember snorkeling with my best friend in Perhentian and then swam to this big rock in the middle of the ocean without any life jacket ( and some people said they saw baby sharks around there)

I remember using the toilet at the Perhentian Island campsite, and when I turned on my torchlight, I saw three frogs sitting at the toilebowl, watching me pee :|

I remember eating 9 takoyaki's within 15 minutes, because I was so hungry and up to now, I never dare touch a box of Takoyaki.

I remember putting a snake around my neck, a white python to be precise, and then got scared to bathe, because I could still feel the snake around my neck :/

I remember throwing Jyh Ling's soft toy down from the 9th floor while Yael and Jyh Ling tried to catch it. heh, that was hilarious. Why did we even do that?

I remember blowing bubbles with Nad to make peoples day ( or ruin their day) and then proceed to playing the sound " PHEW WIT" to random people that walk below my room. ( Yes my room faces the zebra crossing, very strategic location to disturb people :p )

I remember going to the Asian Water Sport Village, and then they asked us to jump into this one lake and I was so scared I kept asking " Are there Piranha's in here!?"

And the lady replied " Well , no one has died of Piranha attacks so far, but we're not sure"

That definitely didn't help. :/

Can i not grow up, oh pretty please, I just want to stay 21.

I've got a plan!

I just thought of something.

A road trip, take the random train to random places, seeing sights and things we've never seen before. Of course, I need people who are actually willing to go with me and who have the same passion of food and sight seeing.

I've asked Joyce ( no reply). Prolly ask her to bring Melissa and her friends.

I want to ask Squid ( he's somewhere in the wilderness) and probably ask him to bring a crazy friend or two of his.

I don't know if this will actually turn out, I don't really want to put my hopes up TOO high, so yeah. I'm just leaving all this to God. :-)

I say, how much would it cost :S hoho =p

One month break.

One month break this time around. Last semester we headed to Tioman and I had a blast at Melaka. It was the best semester break ever. Now I'm hoping that some club's going to organise some wild trip to any island or anywhere.

So how should I fully utilize my break?

Genting? Singapore? Australia? Phuket?

Sleep at home? Work at the Riding Club?

& why the sudden sadness? ( I know because I am afraid I am going to miss you badly, ish don't have to think until there Sarah, you think so far ahead)

So time to fully utilize this month. :-) I feel motivated already.

Things that make me happy;

1. Warm smiles from people I love

2. Warm laughter from people I love

3. A day out with my girl friends, just doing nothing but eat, laugh, look at t-shirts and never buying them

4. A sunny day in the garden with my golden retriever

5. Sleeping on the bench by the beach, listening to the waves and falling asleep by the cool breeze

6. Going to the stalls, sitting there for hours just talking or playing a poker game or two

.

7.Home cooked meal by my mother

8. My fathers laughter and him trying to annoy us by blocking the television

9. Picking up my brother from school, seeing him run after my car ( Sometimes I purposely drive the car away just to annoy him)

10. Laying on the grass, watching the aeroplanes.

11. Sitting on the beach at night at Tioman, watching the many stars. They were so many, as though God painted them specifically for me.

12. Reading Roald Dahl's books.

13. Having maggie mee goreng with dhal curry.

14. A jump into the pool after a long day of classes

15. Nice cooling coke.

16. Being able to wake up, and when I turn left, right, up, down I see so many blessings.

17. A beautiful sister.

What makes you happy?

Is it the materialistic things of the world? or the slightest smallest things in life? :-)

Thursday Night!

It's Thursday night, holidays almost ending.

Kind of sad, because this holidays I've been pretty much busy with house chores or sleeping or watching television, using the facebook ( I do not know how we can get addicted to it )

while the family's either off to school and all sorts.

It's so hard to have a decent holiday with the family once we've all stepped into university and I really should start acting like a twenty one years old.

I may look mature and all, but I think my mind's has not really reached the 21 year old stage. C'mon, things that I put priority? I mean there is a share of fun for me to enjoy, but at the same time, Sarah, this is university. The stepping stone to adulthood.

The stepping stone to your career. I don't even know what I wanted to work in when mom asked me the other day. But I have a feeling, it has something that does not have any relation to accounting. Probably work at the restaurant or hotel line.

And also to help out at, at least one NGO. I think I might choose the Denai Alam Riding Club. or WWF. :-)

Can't wait to cook tomorrow woohoo,

trying out this one new recipe. I feel hungry already :/

I'm hungry.

Good day!

This morning an amazing person called me, at 2am and then again at 7am.

" Hey you are still asleep?! Wake up" and he laughed.

Which definitely made my morning!

You see, this person is never awake at 7am most of the time, and now he's feeling pretty proud he is awake at this hour! :-)

Well, it's already Thursday, midterm break's almost over.

Back to yee mee goreng everyday. Oh daddy got us face paint, and dad asked us to paint our faces and walk around the neighbourhood with it >:)

#aprilswillbeagoodmonth

Read the requirements of an accounts executive at a company.

I don't even qualify.

Need to work hard.

Today I had a pretty nice day, from an brunch that was the biggest brunch of my life ( sheperd's pie, seafood pasta & homemade burgers ) , ice skating while watching the hockey team practice and horseriding and learning about the the horse riding club. They're NGO's! :)

Okay exhausted. :(

Pot Luck day, tomorrow.

It's pot luck day tomorrow at my place, and I am supposed to be asleep. But I got caught up with something. Actually someone. And thank goodness you don't read my blog. No one does. hehe. You said you read my twitter daily, that's embarrassing enough.

So i'm making seafood pasta. L's bringing over Shepherd's Pie, golly I can't WAIT. N's making burger, I hope she makes them.

Today you told me something. And I realise I am actually such a jerk. An inconsiderate person. :(

Oh well. Tomorrow's a bright new day, got to wake up even before the sun comes out! ( not literally)

Think the good!

So, I was going through the 1001 questions on auditing, since I want to ace this paper, but my brain can't seem to think good things. Always the negative. So I am going to list down the good things you have done for me, please bear with me.

1. Scuba dived with me

2. Gave me your slippers when mine broke while we were cycling the the kampung at Tioman

3. Watch the stars with me at Tioman

4. Walked with me all the way to Secret Recipe, when you were sick, under the rain so that I could have my brownie.

5. Came all the way in the cold from Bangi, just because I wanted you here.

6. Go to the parks with me, watch the sunset, buy me ice cream.

7. Tolerating me for quite a long time.

8. Going out and spending cash on movies and cruising around Melaka Town.

9. Going to Jonker Town, to get Assam Laksa and all ,just because I wanted to try it.

10. Going to my friends birthday party with me, when you could be asleep the whole Sunday afternoon.

11. Taking me to KFC just because I have cravings for them.

12. Going to Street Mall with me, just because I wanted a caramel custard.

13. Helping me out at Tioman, when I was low on cash. And when I didn't want to go on the boat ride, you rented snorkerlling mask instead so that you and I still could have a fun time.

14. Always starting new each day, even when I've accused you for things you didn't do. Just because I think too much)

15. Walking back from KFC, all the way. I know what a lazy bum you are. ;p

That's a lot of sacrifices done, now think the good!

:)

My to do list:

1. Ace the Auditing midterm.

2. Save the world.

( repeat step 1 & 2 until you get full marks )

" It's like, all my past regrets or embarrassments or anything I didn't feel particular content about myself are all I can think about. and then I go and start making up bad stuff to think about myself. I realise the absurdity of it throughout the entire process, but I still can't help it " - quoted from bluelegend7.blogspot.com

Just so you know, that's how I am feeling. EXACTLY how I am feeling.

Squid said to me, why are you always not happy with yourself? You even take half an hour to dress!

He told me to stop thinking too much , because he has been telling that a million times already. That we have gone through this a thousand times.

I said, well, it's like I am not good enough for people. Like when I made the spaghetti for you, you don't seem happy with it.

Squid asked me " Well but did I finish it up in the end?"

I answered " Yes, you even ate mine"

He asked " What about the soup? or the tomyam? Did I finish it in the end?"

And then I felt absurd. Technically I have been unhappy and hurting my brains and neglecting my studies because I think too much, when people around me are actually happy with me and not annoyed with me. I have prayed for the peace and strength from God. Feeling much better now, to know that nothing has changed. That it was I, who have been so unhappy all along, when everyone else around me loves me. :)

Okay here I go thinking again. It hurts. And I'm hungry. STOP THINKING TOO MUCH. Everyone is having a pleasant holiday except you, because you don't trust, you feel insecure and think too much. There are so many other things to think about, so many other things people are thinking about besides this. People are worrying over their education, their grades, their internship. Be grateful, stop scowling, learn to smile before people actually leave you because you are such an unpleasant person.

There go eat, if it makes you happy :)

Roald Dahl

""If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly.

You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth,

but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams

and you will always look lovely."

— Roald Dahl (The Twits)"

Roald Dahl books are amazingly unique. I was reading one about Red Riding Hood. And this red riding hood had a pistol.

Things I can stand on. Things to remind myself, things to show how privileged and lucky I am.

You're not happy enough about yourself. Be happy with yourself, then you'll be more positive.

I love you too

I want you to work hard, to complete it, be positive dear daughter and don't give up

You promised me something before you entered university, before I sent you off.

I told your grandparents, I will take care of them, even when I was as young as 10. And I took care of them, until the very end.

Once a promise is made Sarah, keep to it. A yes, is a yes. A no, is a no.

No matter what, even if we scold you, we still love you, always.

Every single day I wait for you. I get excited when I hear your name.

I don't know what has gotten into me, but just so you know I am waiting. I hope you would not get pissed or whatsoever, you used to be really nice to me. You used to care for me. Maybe because we're so near, we're not used to it.

Sorry if I lack of understanding.

Sorry for always wanting you by my side.

Sorry for always wanting to be a part of your life.

Sorry.

I am sorry.

Tension. Seriously.

I can't take it anymore. I am not happy these few days, like something triggered it. I think I lost the peace and happiness from my God. And it's so hard when it's gone. I feel so empty and get angry at my family.

The only thing that actually pleases me, are the earthly things.

Yes, earthly things.

I think I have actually fallen into the worldly ideas.

I think I have lost what I used to have, that is the inner peace from God. Where has it all gone too?

Today, I picked up the bass. I enjoyed playing it with the band. That calm me down, as I entered into the other world, as my fingers run along the bass. As I enjoy the music and the smooth sound of the low bass.

Help me God, I have lost it. I have lost this, I have lost myself.

Who am I and where I am? I am scared.

At the end of the day, when we're almost near our homes,

he'll give me a kiss on the forehead,

He said that it meant, " I love you"

It's holiday, time to party in the USA

Hi! The long awaited break ( okay not really) is here.

Which means studying my butt off to increase my CGPA >:) I long for knowledge, I yearn to learn the ways of an auditor ( the heck :| you could tell I was lying at the last few sentences)

So, how did the futsal selections? It was pretty fun, the coach made me play three out of three games non stop. Gosh, it was tiring! Asha, a girl in Holland jersey gave me a smile and thumbs uo after my attempt in trying to score a goal. Shafie , the student coach and guy who plays for one of the FC in campus, said I got my position right, but I should just try to score whenever I get the ball.

It's Saturday, and I am honestly trying to enjoy my holidays. Actually I miss campus way much more compared to home. Maybe it's because i've been home regularly that I actually miss campus more.

Anyway, I should go soon, see if mom needs help making lunch. She's making mee bandung and nasi briyani ( google if you don't know what those two dishes are)

Happy holidays xx